If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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