therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Do vagina's smell?
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize
