Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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