Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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