Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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