Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
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