ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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