Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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