I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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