i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
