i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
