Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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