Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I have tasted many bathrooms