The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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