Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Randomize
