i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Randomize
