Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
