4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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