how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Randomize
