I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Randomize