i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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