do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
