This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
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you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
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Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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