i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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