Can Purell be used as lube?
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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