just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
