I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I forget how to act sober
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize