Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
FUCK WHALES
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
