I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
