I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
