I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
