its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
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