I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
