It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize