My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I am available for nakedness
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.