I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
