im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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