worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
