Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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