Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
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