Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Randomize
