$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
