I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
