he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
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