dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
