I can't watch pbs sober anymore
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
MIDGETS
????
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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