So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
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