What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize