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Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
