Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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