I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
