If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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