That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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